Pumpkinship

These pictures are all taken from the pumpkin patch at Baldwin Farms when our class went on a mini-fieldtrip there the other week.

In the top left picture, I am taking a picture (as usual). The rest of the pictures are all ones taken by me on that day. As a student in this class, it is my personal goal to be less isolated. I have noticed that I'm perfectly capable and comfortable when alone. But, I am learning that this doesn't mean I should be.

In Eds 150, I don't want to check out with my camera because instead I want to interact with other people and learn from them. I noticed at the pumpkin patch that I was sort of at a crossroads. I could either hang out with people and have fun, or I could take pictures. Don't get me wrong, taking pictures is definitely one of my passions and I wouldn't stop doing it just at the drop of a hat. But I do think that maybe I could moderate my frequency better, not necessarily because it's an issue to anyone else, but it might sort of be one for me.

Sometimes I do want to just live a moment instead of capturing it. This personal goal applies to me as a student, but also as a teacher. I know I will not be able to take as many pictures of my students as I do of my classmates (unless I get permission slip waivers and they're all fine with it). But I know that won't be the case. And as hard as it may be, I will refrain from doing so even in the most Kodak moments, if they feel uncomfortable with it. So if in less than 10 years, I won't be able to act this way in my classroom, why am I spoiling myself now? Aren't I supposed to be preparing for being a teacher? Yes.

I really want to get on the same level as my students, which I have said in an entry before. But I mean it. I don't want to be on a pedestal of "I'm better than you". Even if that means my photography will not fly because it separates me from everyone else (including them). It is a hard piece to swallow, but I will try to work on it now so I can be better prepared when the time comes and I don't necessarily have a grace period to adjust.

This experiences has also taught me that when I'm a teacher, I don't want to label any of my students. For example, sometimes in EDS, I'm just gonna be honest...I am labeled as "the camera girl". How many people put that as one of my three facts on the mid-term? Probably 90% of the class. I don't want people to have an expectation of me that I will ALWAYS take pictures, instead of getting to know me and learning something else about who I am, not what I do. (Just as much as I don't want grades to define a student, I don't want a hobby to define them-or me- either).